Girl's formality guy's Love

If a survey be done on why most hearts break worldwide , I think one cause that will really stand out is that the things (gestures, smiles and SMSes) a girl did out of sheer formality , guy took as liking  (or love for that matter . Guys are impatient they don't want to be stuck in this Like zone for long :)). Blame it on guy's impulse to assume exclusivity.How on earth does a sweet gesture guarantee thats its not done for every fourth person she meets .The key here is the key is  number of encounter of that person ,( here again my half life funda comes into play ), it being guy's first time  and her fifth , she is 4 times more in control than him. This exposure difference is so typical when good colleges are doomed to be girl minority :(

Poor guy  hoping his kite of romance will fly with this romantic (every wave from the girl one likes  is romantic :)) wave . not to be...... this is one situation where even the Law of Averages fails him .For the uninitiated Law of Averages says that after 3 consecutive hundreds a Tendulkar will be out cheaply, never mind the form or the confidence level . its when the law catches up with him . similarly a Harbhajan ,after a series of single digit scores , will contribute substantially  .Anyways The poor guy thought he has outpersevered his bad luck and spends hours thinking rehearsing, re-rehearsing  the things he would say to her , just to get her smile ,just one smile exclusively for him, the smile that would wipe out all the unpleasantness  from his trackrecord .But thats when reality stikes , he finds the girl , his girl , showing the same warmth to some body else . thats when a sense of Betrayal strikes him ,how can she ....why couldn't she talk to him formally , why didn't she discuss the issue with  a female colleague in the first place .All girls are the same , inse to bat karna bekar hai, akhir main dil toot hi jata hai .

Heavy hearted the guy comes back  deletes all the SMSes from her which he once cherished (which he used as mood enchancers ) , thinks of deleting her from his facebook friendlist but a second thought tells him he wouldn't be able to see her pics once he does that. may be she deserves a second chance . may be it was real urgent stuff she was talking, may be she knows him from a long time , may be he is just a friend , may be , may be.....

The girl on the other hand , completely in oblivion of what this guy is thinking ,has her career as a sole  priority and has drawn clear cut lines for social conduct. she will smlile to the silliest of jokes when in a group but in a one to one conversation, will be a little serious with a guy without compromising on warmth.she would just  not react to anything that is remotely romantic or ahead of the situation .
and so it goes on ,the characters remain the same . the actors change .................

The curse of Bollywood songs

I think Bollywood songs are the main culprit for India being known as a sentimental nation and rightly so. Bollywood songs provide words to feelings which would have been better dealt-with from the subconscious .They bring feelings into the realm of the consciousness thereby aggravating the trouble .I have seen far too many people listening to senti songs after a not so good  emotional encounter (read reality bite) .and whats infinitely worse is the excuse they offer ,that in "this mood" they want to hear such songs only .Cant help mentioning the truck drivers who would play songs announcing how their love ditched them with killer lines like  "uski doli uth rahi thi ,mera janaza nikal raha tha" Come on , get a life.

By expresing our feelings through  songs we are only distorting our view of the event .Bollywoods songs are just statistical "mode" of feelings, more so the romantic ones . Say for example "kahin to hogi vo duniya jahan tu mere pass hai ". i mean who wouldn't empathize to such a line when 99% of people are not with the person they wanted and the remaining 1 % are finding  out that the person they so desperately desired is nothing but human with all the characteristic imperfections that didn't seem to matter earlier.  I personally would go to the extent of  disapproval to discussing sentimental problems with "close " friends because it only shuffles the priorities in your mind (not to forget it adds an extra factor to worry about of having to put a face in front of the person you are discussing). I didn't say that we bottle up all problems and choke ourselves with frustration .All i m trying to say is that we should "objectify "  the problem before discussing to another person, we should be clear about what  is to be done unconditionally and what remains variable and its still better to know the exhaustive set of values the variable can take i.e. the possible line of actions

I personally have made the same mistake innumerable times,discussing "live" problems, may be out of  sheer need of sympathy :).Still do ;) but i would like to think i deal with them better now :)

the statistical nature of luck

Wouldn't luck like all of us prefer to have options. we cant just be good in one thing and ask our luck to make it a success.By being  good at many things we put less pressure on luck giving it a handful of options to choose from. This explains why people who have back-up plans (read good placements) tend not to need them as they convert good mba colleges and the much talked about and never worked upon 'Rich are getting  rich and poor are getting  poorer '. The rich as the book 'Rich dad poor dad' so loudly tells u gave ample opportunity to their (good)luck . while the poor look for reasons to curse theirs
If you give your good luck too many chances it will take a few  while bad luck 'creates opportunities ' . Personally  i believe in statistical nature of luck or in other words the sum total being same for  every body .for some luck manifests in form of fame,  for some money and for the rest  peace of mind which generally eludes the former . there is no way to ascertain that an an IITian is more lucky than a regular college (in love IITians are much  less statistically speaking ;) )

the cynic in me

sometimes i waste lot of time in futile arguments. there is no use convincing people about anything. first they try their level best in not accepting anything outside their prejudice second even if they lose the argument ,all they take from there is that i  disproved them so next time whatever i say they will try to disprove me . no body in this world needs advices , everyone needs their prejudices to be reaffirmend or they just want to vent out their reasons to someone just to prove to themselves that they are being reasonable
everything good i do goes into the cache and anything bad goes into hard disk. stupid fuck. i have far more important things to worry about
for once vik was right . phone conversations actually worth nothing . 3 years of phone friendship is just one misconstruation away from falling apart . go to hell all of you

why women are emotionally smarter than men

every one of us has seen a guy becoming "devdas" in love,but not many of us saw a girl going crazy in love for too long. . females are far better in "drawing the lines" so to speak.blame it on the work they routinely perform.
i always believed this at the back of my mind but a recent incident brought it into the open. last sunday i endeavoured to try my hand at cleaning my room owing to a one month long absence of my maid.i tried to be a perfectionist at first and ended up taking too much on myself. its like the half life thing every time you swipe the room with the wet cloth , the dust levels became half of previous value you cant just 'complete' it ,add to that marks i would leave by my foot.that moment i really admired my buaji's approach. she once made a room closed from years livable in an hour as she knew when to stop . hats off
i think girls are programmed to be like that from the starting. they are warned time and again not to get stuck with one thing,they are always taught to play safe ,while guys are encouraged to be daring.hence most girls would not say hi to a guy if she has the slightest doubt he may not reply back  or for that matter reply to a guys sms . they test the guys seriousness by ignoring.vaise to be fair to them the attitudeof our society has a lot to do with this . a girl ignoring a guy is a routine but the converse is a news. the extreme case of this when a guy rejects a girl her image takes a irreversible beating and only way to regain that is to change the workplace.

problem discussion with girls

discussion with girls never solves problems .at best u can get sympathy which however good it may sound at first , makes you see the problem in a graver light than it actually is..compared to a guy who will start off by saying chal be . sabke sath hota hai ye....... ultimately its only you who is goibg to solve the problem its all about the point of view that gets effected